ON THE BACK BURNER

I belong to a new group. It could become national. It is a group of directionally challenged people. So far there are four life time members. In order to belong, you have to have had  made an undisclosed number of U turns when you realized that you were going the wrong direction. You would also have had an argument with Siri , your GPS or your ONStar button about the fact that you were sure that they were wrong and you were going the right way. It was absolutely, their fault. You have to take an oath to belong. It goes like this."I admit ( fill in your name) that I would get lost in a paper bag. " I suspect that the membership would be mostly women. Men seem, and I generalize here, not to want to stop for directions. And when they do, they understand them. I can never get past, " go to the next light , turn right and at the next street go left" Was that right then left or the other way around. And mentioning arounds is not allowed in this group. Round abouts are meant to destroy confidence. They can make you dizzy .There is no such thing as a good round about. Europe seems to have figured it out, but Venice hasn't. Cards will be printed for members of this elite group giving full details of what to say to the police officer when you are stopped for making an illegal U turn. It can range from"I am pregnant and rushing to the hospital, or it is a beautiful day  and I just wanted to enjoy the experience of going in circles". Membership is free.

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Latest comments

01.12 | 14:15

Safe travels. See you soon. sally

04.07 | 12:10

I read the last page first too. It’s a family curse.

22.05 | 12:38

so glad youre here mom!

29.08 | 17:45

Don't quite know how this got to me but it was on the top line of my computer (not in email) But I really enjoyed it. I truly admire you.